Lake Logan

Once upon a time, a little boy named Logan began to potty train. He used pull ups and Underwear, and learned very quickly what he needed to do. In the middle of a conversation he would run in to exclaim to all present that, "ME POOP, ME POOP, Now Yummy?" And obliging I would hand over a small handful of jelly beans. Someday I wish for the simplicity of life, where I drop my pants goo Poop and get food for free. I feel someone needs to make a form of government based on this principle. For all the humorous events that occurred potty training my 3-year-old, this short post isn't about that, rather it is about the terror that every parent should have with a little boy, who is free of his diaper.

My Wife and I were in the Kitchen, busy moving some furniture in my quarterly re-arrangement of the house, when Logan came rushing in with a loud shout that, "PEE PEE PEE PEE" This usually means one thing. it’s his way of telling me, "PULL THIS CAR OVER RIGHT NOW FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, BEFORE I PEE OVER EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE YOU HOLD DEAR!" To which I have gone across 3 lanes of traffic to exit the interstate in .018 of a mile. (Yes, I am that good.)

So Jo ran out of the kitchen wondering why Logan couldn't get into the bathroom, the door was open, there was toilet paper. But yet Logan yelled more emphatically than before that PEE. I began to worry that he had let a leak in his underwear, but as Jo checked, and that option was taken of the list. She began asking 20 Questions, a 3-year old’s favorite game.

1. Did you pee?
A: Yes
2. Did you pee your pants?
A: No
3. Did the dogs pee?
A: Yes, um no
4. Did the pee in the toilet get flushed?
A: No
5. Where's the pee!?!?!
A: Here Mama, right Here

Around that question, I heard the conversation go more like this...

Oh, no, wait, Oh no please no.. NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

6. DID YOU PEE ON THE FLOOR!?"
A: Yes

My wife then came into the kitchen and sat dejectedly on the chair, and said, that I was needed in the Living room. I went into the living room and Logan looked at me, grabbed his rear end said, sorry dada, sorry dada no spank" grabbed a paper towel and threw it on the lake he had just created in front of the couch.

Needless to say, it was explained we don't pee on the floor. I don't however think he bought my reason about why he can’t, because he kept on referring to the dogs favorite spot to use in the house when they have accidents.

Tomorrow is Friday, and then it’s the weekend... 15 more years, you can do it, just 15 more years :)